And suddenly I start to realize that this is not a dream,
That I’m far away from the person I have been before.
Suddenly I see where all this pain is coming from,
And all I’m thinking of is “I wanna go home”.
There’s no way out, at least that’s what my mind is telling me,
Eating, bingeing, hating, that’s how my life should be.
The dark, sometimes so tempting and warm crawling in,
should be a place where I do not belong and never have been.
I see the guy and his parents, walking on a Sunday on the street,
I’m thinking of my family, myself, and my heart starts to bleed.
I’m not myself, don’t realize what I’m doing with my life right now,
Every day is a struggle, a fight, a pain I manage somehow.
My problems are about relationships, how I get along with people and trying to be me,
But I try to avoid those thoughts, replaced with food, I start to see.
My life is not about living anymore,
But without food, I ask myself what am I living for.
The hardest part is to face your fears and moving on,
But I have to, I need to, find where I belong.
It’s a battle I can win and have to fight,
Otherwise I will never see the bright, freeing light.
This poem is not about falling again,
It’s about rise and shine, start glowing again.
We only have that one life, we should be thankful for,
Start to live, enjoy life and seek for more.