I am a senior year high school student and next year I’m planning to study law in UK. My hobbies include acting, writing and baking. I’m occasionally performing at the local theatre in my city and I’m working on a new piece with a couple of friends.
How has Beating Eating Disorders helped you?
It really helped me to understand many important aspects of both physical and mental recovery! When I started my recovery journey, I used to be quite uneasy and confused about what was happening with my mind and body. The articles and blog posts I found on your page have literally opened my eyes and gave me a broader knowledge of the subject of eating disorders.
Where are you in your recovery journey?
I am fully recovered now.
What are your future recovery orientated goals?
I want to continue educating myself on the subjects of recovery, body image and mental health as well as spread the awareness of eating disorders among other people. I also wish to practice self-love and learn how to take better care of myself, especially now when I’m planning to move out and become more independent.
What is the most helpful thing someone has said to you? What has been the most harmful?
I received many positive as well as negative comments about my behaviors and body, but I particularly remember the moment when my best friend found out that I have a recovery oriented Instagram. We couldn’t meet at that time so she texted me saying that I’m extremely brave and strong for doing that and that she is very proud of me and wishes me all the best.
On the other hand, during the time when I lost a significant amount of weight i heard many harmful things from my family who did not know how to react to the situation that was completely new to them. I was growing up in a quite dysfunctional environment but I was never the one who was associated with troubles, therefore my illness was something unexpected to everyone and many could not understand where did it come from. I was told that I look horrible and one day it went so far that I was called a “fucking anorexic”, even though I did not have anorexia, but it was the only thing that my family associated with losing weight and restricting certain foods.
Share some of your recovery insight.
As I mentioned in my previous answer, my recovery journey was hard because I did not receive much support from my family and barely anyone of my friends was aware of my problems. I decided to recover for myself and by myself. I reached out to professional treatment but I was refused due to my weight “not being low enough”. That experience made me realize that eating disorders are extremely misunderstood in our society and that sick people are sometimes literally encouraged to get more sick in order to receive help.
I used MinnieMaud guidelines and tried to eat about X calories per day, however I avoided making scrupulous calculations because I found them a bit too triggering. I really wanted to feel free around food again and get rid of the fitness addiction. I realized that my health was in serious danger and so did my mind. I had to teach myself that happiness does not come from controlling what I eat and how much I weight. I used the “eat until you beat it rule” and tried to eat all of my “fear foods” as often as possible. I read a lot of recovery related pages and blogs (including Beating Eating Disorders) which helped me to understand how dangerous diet culture is. Eventually, I started a therapy and gradually made progress every week.
Is there anything else you would like to add that you want people to know? Any advice to give to fellow sufferers?
I want everybody to know that it is completely right to put yourself first. I’ve seen many people saying that they want to recover to make their parents, friends and partners less worried and happy. Yes, all those reasons are important but the main reason for recovery is your own mind and body. I also would like to spread the message that recovery IS possible and that you can get through it, no matter how difficult your current life situation is.