Ethnicity/Nationality/Race/Religion: Half-Indian and Half-French, American, Atheist
I am an actress, violinist, dancer, and scholar. When I am healthy enough to return to university, I hope to study Shakespeare and become the Shakespearean scholar of my generation.
How has Beating Eating Disorders helped you?
Beating Eating Disorders has been an endlessly inspiring source of positivity for me. I’d like to contribute to he organization somehow whether it be through this feature, or a contributed blog post, or a peer mentorship.
Where are you in your recovery journey?
I am almost weight restored, and I have just graduated from a cardiac rehabilitation program. I am determined to recover once and for all, because ten years is too, too long to suffer. I have wasted too much time and missed too many opportunities because of my eating disorder. I want a future and a chance to realize my dreams.
My advice for anyone recovering would be ‘just do it.’ Go all in. Gain weight. Stop exercising. Try fear foods. It’s scary, but you know what’s also scary? Dying of an eating disorder. Recovery isn’t something you can half-ass; commit to it and commit to yourself. It’s not the just right choice, but the ONLY choice.
What are your future recovery orientated goals?
I hope to gain those last ten pounds and finally be weight restored. I also want to be able to try and succeed at intuitive eating. I would love to develop a healthy relationship with exercise, as it’s something I have to do to keep my heart healthy.
What is the most helpful thing someone has said to you? What has been the most harmful?
Harmful: ‘You’ve gained so much weight this year, but you haven’t gotten taller.’ –My mom to me in seventh grade, which was what made my eating disorder get really bad. She also said about frappuccinos, which I would drink with friends after soccer games, ‘These are so bad for you. They’ll make you gain weight you don’t need to gain.’
Helpful: I honestly have no idea. Simple reassurance from people I admire has helped me greatly.
Is there anything else you would like to add that you want people to know?
Eating disorders are live threatening diseases. You may think the complications won’t hit you, but they will; it’s only a matter of time. You need to recover while you still can, because someday, it’ll be be too late.